Confession..............

Hello, friends and readers. I'm sorry I've been MIA for a few weeks. It's been a little crazy around here. The girls went to a half day, week long summer camp AND our household goods shipment FINALLY arrived. Keep in mind, I'm doing this without the physical help of my husband. 

This post is going to be short and sweet, for a few reasons. One, I'm exhausted and really don't have much to talk about since my life has been consumed by mountains of boxes. And two, I'm embarrassed, but have to admit something to you all, in hopes of holding myself accountable. 

So, lets go back to my household items arriving. On the evening that they arrived, I was frantically opening boxes, searching for my youngest daughters teddy bear...that I never found. While opening said boxes, I came across my scale. I ignored it, because like I said, I was looking for something special. 

Fast forward to the next day. I was unpacking my daughters' closet, when unbeknownst to me, the scale was one of their boxes. I know I saw it the day before, but I didn't remember or chose to forget the placement of said scale. 

I take the scale out, and set it aside, and finish unpacking clothes, hanging them, etc. But after a disagreement over email with my husband, and me feeling overwhelmed, I walked over to the scale and..............I stepped on it. 

I.WEIGHED.MYSELF.

I stood there, staring at the number. It had gone down from the last time that I had stepped on a scale. Which is good, because it had been 71 days since doing so. But it wasn't a fantastic number, nor did it equal how great I was feeling about myself. I didn't freak out or anything. Nor did I weigh myself again.

Later that night, I made the confession to my husband, and I felt horribly guilty and disappointed in myself. It was then that I realized, I am an emotional cutter. Instead of cutting away at my physical body, I cut away at my self esteem and worth.

I'm Nicole, and I'm an emotional cutter, and it's been 2 days since I stepped on the scale. 

Here's to resisting the urge.........